Christmas at Vonda's

Jeff's turkey was amazing.. It really truned out very good.. Christmas at Vonda's was just weird.. She isn't the same and the guy she married Brad is just strange.. We did have a nice visit with Mandy and Corey and I ate way too much food..

Today I get back on my diet and exercise.. I have not exercised in a month so I'm going to start out 30 minutes on the treadmill this week..

Not much else to say.. Hope everyone is doing well..

Cole

Cole came home last night from work and wasn't able to see out of his right eye.. The doctor didn't do surgery on his right only  his left.. It now looks like he will have to do it on his right.. Cole will call the doctor this morning.. Poor guy.. I wish we knew what was causing this..

Not much going on with us till the weekend.. Jeff is off Friday and Saturday and we go to my brothers house on Friday to do Christmas with the kids and my dad. Then Saturday we go to Eden to have Christmas with Jeff's mom and sister and kids.. Jeff is smoking a turkey to take with us Saturday.. I love smoked turkey, I can't wait..

Thats all I got.. Hope everyone has a great day..

Merry Christmas

I hope everyone has a great day.. The boys and I will be going over to my aunt Jane's house for the day of food and gifts.. I'm really dreading it for the first time in years.. My favorite aunt won't be there and now Lawrence and Rondi won't be there so I will have no one that I want to hang out with except my Daddy.. I really miss my aunt Cindy and my cousin Lacey and Uncle Pete.. They are my favorite family members..  Oh well...

update

Cole's eyes are healing good. He gets to go back to work and normal routine on Monday.. Still haven't gotten all the blood work back to know what caused it in the first place, but they said it could take up to a month to get all the results back..
 Going shopping today .. Hope everyone has a great day..

Cole

We go for another checkup today.. I sure hope all is well and he can go back to work.. He is so bored. Jeff will have a short day today and we will either finish our Christmas shopping or do it tomorrow. He is off Thursday and Friday..

I don't really have much to blog about.. I hope everyone is well and that yall have a great day..

Its been a good week

Our trip to San Antonio was fun..we got home about 9:30 Wednesday night and I went to bed.. Thursday I just did laundry and was completly lazy.. Friday Jordan and I got all of our Christmas shopping done.. All we like is Jordan's gifts and one more for Cole.. We looked all day for one of Jordan's gifts , but never could find anything he liked. He wants a nice comfy chair for his room to sit in while he plays his xbox.. Cole has one and I have to admit it looks way better than the egg chair Jordan currently uses.. But we couldn't find one that was just right.. Target has one that looks good and cheap enough , but it sits too low to the ground for Jordan..
Today we have my niece's bday at 1:30 and then tonight we are going to a Christmas performance at my aunt and uncle's church..
Well thats all I got.. Hope everyone is well.. Hope yall have a great weekend.

Day Trip

I'm so excited, Jeff is off tomorrow and the next and since Cole can't work yet we are taking off tomorrow and going to San Antonio for the day.. Our number one reason of course is so Jeff can buy his Christmas present at Bass Pro, but hey I will take a day trip for that.. Bass Pro is a neat store.. Then I don't know what else we will do in San Antonio, but before we head home we are going to go the outlet mall near San Marcus...The only thing that would make this trip perfect is a new car to travel in...Yes I got the ' I wanna new car' syndrome... My durango is old and we can't take it out of town anymore.. Its fine for running around here , but Jeff doesn't trust it to travel in..I don't want a car paymet is the only thing keeping us from having a new car.. We haven't had a car paymet in two years and I really like that..

Our tree is up , but I haven't even began to Christmas shop yet.. Hopefully tomorrow I will get some things . I need to make a list of what gifts I need to get..I can't believe Christmas is only14 days away.

Hope everyone has a great day

blood work

Yesterday the nurse called Cole and told him that some of the blood work came back and so far everything has been negative.. Thats good and bad news..

Cole is so bored he is driving all of us up the wall.. He needs to get out of the house today before I hurt him.. The doctor told him he can drive during the day now, but still no late night get together. He is still lay around and take it easy.. Now is the time where damage could happen cause he feels better and can see, so he thinks his eye is good, but its still not. so he still has to be a  couch potatoe..The doctor said he could go places during the day, but kids get carried away at night and he needs to stay away from that kind of activity.. Cole was bumed out he thought he was going to get to go party this weekend.. I told him probably not, not until he gets released to go back to work will he get to go back to partying...Sam has been coming over a lot this week and last week.. There not dating just friends.. I asked Cole how that works and he told me she has always been his best friend.. I asked him if thats strange since they were a couple before , and he says no... And to see them two together its just the same as it always was.. I always felt like they were more friends than lovers anyway..

Hope everyone has a great day.

update

Cole finially got the blood work done yesterday morning.. Then his eye doctor appointment was yesterday.. His eyes are healing well.. We go back in two weeks.. Still no work for him..Thats it.. Hope everyone is doing good.

so frustrated

I'm so frustrated, it really makes me mad that I don't know how to slove my tech. diffulculties..
My main frustrastion is my Kindle Fire.. I have been reading my fanfiction and my twcs web sites from it for months now.. and as of this week for some unknown reason I can't log in on my kindle to read from those web sites.. I can still do it from my phone and the computer.. So I was thinking I needed to change a setting or something on my knidle to fix it, but when I go to settings I don't see how to fix it.. I don't know why this happened I haven't done anything different to it..

Also how do I delete blogs I know longer want to follow?

Cole's eye is still really bloody looking, but he can see out of it.. He goes in Monday for blood work.. Finially !!!!  Then back to Dr. Angle on Wednesday..

I've done well on my eating and exercising , except for yesterday.. I caved and had sweets and bread.. I know today I will suffer a headache when I don't eat carbs again... I have discovered my body does just like it does if I don't have my coffee , I get a bad headache for a whole day when I don't eat carbs.. then by the next day I'm fine..

A neighborhood cat keeps getting into our back yard, and I'm so afraid my dogs are going to kill it.. They don't like cats.. You would think that after the first rescue I had to do the cat would not come back into our back yard, but it has come back 3 times... I really don't want a dead cat.. or a hurt dog..

Hope everyone has a great day.. We are going to put up our tree this week on Jeff's days off.. I'm excited , we didn't do it last year cause we went out of town for Christmas , but this year we will be at home, so we need a tree up.. The boys really don't care, its all me that wants it up..

Cole

Cole's surgery went well. The left eye was worse than the doctor thought it would be so he did have to do more to it. The right eye he was able to just do the laser again.. Cole had a whole in his left eye , but luckily the retna has not detached and the doctor was able to weld it shut (doctors term) .. We go in today at 2 so the doctor can remove the eye patch and check out his eye.. We will also set him up with a family doctor from Shannon to go visit and get the blood work drawn.. Dr. Angle said that with Cole's eyes continueing to bleed he could be bleeding somewhere else in his body.. We need to do the blood work to find out what is causing the bleeding..
Cole enformed me yesterday morning that he couldn't even see out of his left eye.. And it had been like that for while , do to  the blood in his eye..My dad came up and stayed with me at the hospital, and I told him what Cole told me.. When Cole came back to the room and was coherent , my Daddy told Cole he needed to be honest with me and not keep things like that from me.. It was nice to see my Daddy like that..
Speaking of my Daddy, he goes in to the dotor on Friday to see what medicene he will be put on to relieve the stress on his heart...UGH!!!   So mad that they can't fix his heart..
Back to Cole, the doctor said he will not be abel to lift anything over 5 pounds or bend over for at least 2 weeks.. No work for probably 3-4 weeks.. He is just suppose to lay around and be a couch potatoe (doctors term). We will ask today if he can play video games and watch tv..
Well thats all I got.. Hope everyone has a great day.

Laura how did the contest go for Sydni?

were back

We had a fantastic visit with my mom. Thanksgiving was great. I ate way too much.. Tony(my stepdad) was even social this visit.. All I can say is we had a great time and the visit was perfect..

At home my husband could not get enough of me.. To say I was missed is an understatement... I truely felt loved when I got home..

Today I am doing laundry and going to the grocery store.. Monday Jeff is off and Tuesday Cole has his eye surgery.. The doctor says he could be out of work for up to three weeks...

I hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving and great weekend..

Good times

Thursday night was great.. Rondi came and got me around 6. We went to the Grill to eat with 3 of her other friends.. They were going to the Breaking Dawn movie also , but not at the same time as us.. We got to the movie theater around 8 , lines were already forming.. The two friends of Rondi's were for the 10 showing us 10:30 so they got to go into a theater. We had to sit on the floor and wait. At least we were inside.. Then about 10 minutes of us sitting. Rondi's friends texted her and said to come to theater 3 it was still empyt and no one is checking tickets.. So we got up and just walked into theater 3.. We all got to see the movie together.. It was packed , but there were still rows of sits so I didn't feel guilty about taking a seat.. The movie was fricken Awesome, by far the best movie of the whole series. I can't wait to see it again..

Friday I just laundry and laid around after my workout.. I worked out all 5 days really hard and I lost 3 pounds.. I have also given up starches and processed food and stayed around the 1200 cal intake regardless of how many the fitness app said I could eat. Day one and two of no starches were pretty hard I had a headache , but now I feel really good.. One day this week I didn't even eat meat and I was fine, not hungry.. My two favorite meals right now are mushroom and bell pepper omlets and cottage cheese with peaches..

Jeff will be home soon. He only had 6 hours left this week.. He is off Sunday and Monday.. He has to clean out his truck and check everything. We will be taking his truck to my mom's.. He just doesn't trust my car.. My car is older than his truck.. I hate driving his truck, but saftey first..

I leave for my mom's early Tuesday morning.. I'm not taking the dogs with me.. It will be sad to leave them , but it would be to hard without Jeff's help to take them.. I plan on coming home Saturday or Sunday. Not sure which day. Jeff won't be off till Monday and Tuesday..

Cole's eye surgery is Tuesday the 27th

My dad is not well.. He just found out Thursday that the right side of his heart isn't working and the left is working harder to compensate for the right.. And there is nothing that the doctors can do to fix it.. All they can do is prescribe stress medicene to help , but no surgery can repair his heart..

Well thats all I got.. Hope everyone has a fantastic Thanksgiving and Laura tell Sydni I said Good Luck!    I hope yall have a great time next weekend.

strange dream

I watched the LA premier of Breaking Dawn 2 last night, and holy cow that man looked sooo good in his green suit..Yes I kow pathetic, Jeff and the boys give me hard time about watching that stuff.. I like it though.. I like to see everyone all dressed up..

I had the strangest dream last night..It was all of us hanging out at Laura's house and someone Laura worked with was hanging with us too.. Laura invited her because she was new in town and didn't have any friends.. Everything was going good we were sitting around eating and drinking.. I have no idea where the kids and men were.. They were not in my dream.. Anyway were all talking about Laura's bday party that we were going to have in the near future.. Laura was telling everyone what she had planned for all of us.. The rest of us , not including the new girl, were all in agreement with Laura. Then Laura turns to the new girl and invites her to join in for the bday party.. She agree's , but then she like takes over all the planning and what we are going to do.. Its nothing that Laura wants to do. Everyone is speechless and doesn't really no what to do. Because no one wants to cause a confrontation with this girl..Then all of a sudden the girl says something that really pisses me off and I come unglued on her.. You know how my mouth is I tell her exactly what she can do with her plans all by herself, because this was Laura's party and were doing it her way.. The girl got upset and stormed out of the house like a drama queen.. Then I woke up... I woke up laughing at how riduclous that dream was..

Hope everyone has a great day

I was a pig

This past week was hard on my hormones.. Not only did I not exercise because of the stupid monthly visitor. I ate like a pig Friday , Saturday and Sunday.. I feel it today.. I will exercise today and watch what I eat..

My cousins wife met her weightloss goal , she is with Weight Watchers.. She did the whole program online. I'm seriously thinking about checking into it..

We didn't do anything this past weekend..

I'm so exicited, four more days and I will get to see Breaking Dawn part 2

Cole has to have eye surgery. He went in for his 3 month check up on Friday and his eyes regressed. So the doctor is going to go into his eyes and fix them. He was hoping the laser would have fixed the problem so he wouldn't have to do surgery , but it didn't.. He goes in on the 27th..They still never figured out what caused it..

Well thats all I got.. Hope everyone is doing great..

Stalkerish

Not much going on with me.. Just using my dvr like crazy this week. My obesession has been on different programs all week.. On Ellen tomorrow, can't wait for that one. She always makes it fun.

Haven't exercised this week, because you know why is visiting.. I swear it seems each month gets worse and worse..Maybe thats a sign thats its coming to an end.. My mom was young when hers did..

Interesting thing I read on weightloss the other day.. It said that if your mother was fat while pregnant with you , you will be fat too.. No wonder I have constant weight issues, it's because of her not because I love food.. Haa Haa !!!    I wasn't a fat kid, just a fat wife to Jeff.. Of course while I was married to dip shit I struggled with my weight, but I was never this heavy.. The most I weighed married to that idoit was 180 when I delivered Cole..

Going for my eye exam today, its been two years and I'm out of contacts.. Jeff is off Saturday and Sunday..

Well thats all I got.. Hope everyone has a great day.

fun weekend

Jeff was off Friday and Saturday and we got along pretty good. Friday he wanted booze , so we ran up to the liquor store so he could get him some. I still had some vodka.. We haven't drank in a very long time.. So Friday we just hung out and watched t.v. and a few drinks. I only had one drink.. Then Saturday we went shopping.. I tried Thursday night to talk Jeff into going to San Antonio or San Marcus on Friday to go shopping and just mess around for the day, but he didn't want to.. So since we just hung out at the house on Friday , by Saturday I was ready to just shop here.. We had a good day. Jeff got a new pillow.. I hate to spend money on pillows, but we always get really good ones, which means there not cheap.. We lucked out though , the one he inteanded to get was $175 , but he settled for one that only cost $59.. Crazy I know, but thats Jeff for you..Then we were on the hunt for me some brown boots.. I finially found some really cute ones at Dillards.. I love them , I can't wait to wear them.. On the way out of the mall we went through JCPenny's and I found 3 shirts as well.. Two long sleeve and one short, but the short sleved one was on clearence for $3.50.. I love me a bargan..Once we got home I was digging through my closet to dust off my black boots.. I have had them for two years now, got them at Famous Footwear. I love them they are so comfy I even wore them in Vegas the whole time, but when I dusted them off the upper part of the boot is peeling. Makes me sad.. They look terrible, but I will probly hang on to them until I can get me new black ones.. Jeff gave me a lecture about you get what you pay for, but hey to me they were expensive I think they were $79 two years ago.. We are so different when we shop.. I want the most for my dollar and he would spend the whole amount on one item.. All in all we  had a good weekend..

So frustrated

I'm so mad!!!  The first week following that fitness app I lost two pounds , which I was so happy about. The next week I did the exact same thing as the first week and gained one pound..I don't understand how that is possible.. I exercised and stayed within or under my allowed calorie intake..Maybe I'm bloated , I'm suppose to start tomorrow. I really hope thats it and then next week I will show a tremendous amount of weightloss.. Jeff said I look smaller through my middle section and Rondi did too the other night, but I don't see it..

Nothing else to say.. I hope everyone has a great weekend.

Halloween

It was a nice day.. I sat outside on the front porch to pass out candy.. Our street was busy this year..There were so many kids, within an hour all our candy was gone.. Thank God!! Last year we didn't have very many and had so much candy left over.. I like to pass out candy to see all the little kids in there costumes.. I tried to get Jordan to join me , but he had no desire to help..

I've done really good according to my calorie counter.. I still don't see me losing the weight as fast as the app says I will, but oh how I like to dream..I did notice that the app tells me I will lose more weight when I have consumed more calories for that day.. Like after I exercise I get a shit load more calories I can eat. So by the end of the night if I have not used all my calories the app tells me that not good and I need to eat more , then my weight is usually in the low 150's, but if I'm a pig that day and eat all my calories (which to me is a lot)  the app is happy and my weight is in the low 140's. Strange very strange , but I love the little pep comment..

Well thats all I got to say. Hope everyone has a great day.

Not much

I ran into some trouble with my fitness app. Not really trouble , but something it didn't have on the list so I just went with what I thought was the closest to the real thing. Yesterday I was a pig and ate a lot.. I bought for the first time these cheese ravoli's in the frozen section at Sams and there was this receipe on the back of the package so I used it to make the meal.. It was awesome.. I will be doing that again.. For once everyone liked something I made that was new.. There lies the problem on me being a pig it was so yummy.. Good thing I exercised so I could have all those extra calories. This meal was not on the list, but there were two Olive Garden choices close so I just used them.. I think I was pretty close to the real calorie intake.. 

I really want to go shopping for winter clothes.. I only have two long sleve shirts.. I'm in the mood for sweat shirts.. They would hide my middle section and be comfy..

I have nothing else to talk about.. Hope yall have a great day..

Really lovin the app

I am so hooked on that fitness app.. I love that my food choices are in there already. I made banana pudding yesterday the really fattening kind with eagle brand milk and cream cheese and it was there for one of my choices to choose from..I made a pig of myself and had 2 cups and boy was my tummy hurting.. Lesson learned 1 cup is enough..I feel so much better about eating sweets now that when I exercise my calorie intake shoots up. I never use all my calories so eating sweets feels safe. I have lost 2 pounds this week. Still way above my normal weight , but within my 5 pound up and down. I like how the app at the end of the night tells me I could weigh this amount in so many weeks if I keep having days like the one I had today.. Yes I am easily amused!!   My name on that thing is dhayes30 , yall can add me if you want. I haven't added Laura yet because I haven't messed with it yet. Sorry

Rondi came by last night for a bit and she had on some really cute boots like my black ones. She said she just bought them at Ross for $20. I want brown ones like my black ones and she said they had brown ones. So I really want to go shopping today..I also need to drop my coat off at the cleaners to get it cleaned before it really gets cold out..Oh wait its Sunday no cleaners are open..
She made a comment about how smooth my face looked and I told her about the apple cidar vinegar, she is going to get some.. I'm telling you it taste terrible even with lots of water added to it, but I can really see a difference in my face and my skin.. Not to brag , but I have been told that I have really soft skin. I take care of my skin always have, but I have never been able to feel its softness myself. Now I can its just been 7 days on that stuff and my skin is supper soft.. My legs don't hurt as much either, but I don't know if thats because my body is finially get used to my extrem new workout or if its the vigar..

Hope everyone has a great day..

Apps and phone

Laura I downloaded that app you suggested. I like it so far. It freaked me out when after I exercised yesterday it increased my calories.. So far both days I have been below my calorie intake. I am also still using the apple cidar vinegar. I add lots of water to it. It just has too many benefits to using it so I will keep on using it even if it doesn't speed up my metablism..

I think I will have to get a new phone soon.. Mine keeps freezing up and then when I downloaded that new app my phone told me I was out of storage space so I had to delete something already in my phone to keep the fitness one.

Jeff was off Thurs. and Fri. we got along for the most part. We went out to visit Mandy and her new house. Her and Corey bought a place out in Christoval. Its an older home, so its been added onto alot, but its a good fit for them. Jeff liked it. Now he wants to move out to the country or a small town. I told him I would not. We done that before and Jordan and I want to live somewhere that we can go and do stuff. I'm tired of having nothing to do, I don't want to live in the country or a small town. So he said well I guess I would move by myself then, I said I guess you would.. Discussion closed and we moved onto something else.. So maybe I was a little rude , but you know what my baby will be 16 in 6 months and he needs to get a job and I need to get a job. We would have a hard time doing that in the country especially since Jordan doesn't have his drivers license.. Plus now that my kids are grown I would like the next 20 years to be fun then we can move to the country and relax..We could compramise and move by a city into a small town or the country.. That would work..

Today is Lawrence's birthday he turned 37 I think.. I guess that makes us twins cause that how old I am ;)  

Just running to the store today, nothing else going on that I know of..

Hope everyone has a great weekend

Apple Cidar Vinegar

I googled it and found that the awful tasteing stuff has wonderful benefits. So I will keep taking it.. I have done really well on my exercising, but it seems that since I increased my workout I'm more hungry so now I really need to work on that..I may keep a food journal again. Im my head at the time I'm eating seems to be okay with my intake its just after I eat I feel guilty. So keeping track of calories on paper might help..I still feel really bloated and still feel like I'm retaining water in my feet and hands..

I'm so excited Rondi was able to win/buy at the Wall fall festival midnight showing of Breaking Dawn 2 tickets and has invited me to go.. I have never been to a midnight show before and since I'm usually up reading till 2 in the morning it shouldn't be a problem with me being up..I can't wait to see this movie!!!

Jeff and I are getting along. His moods have been pleasant.. We are going to vote tomorrow, he will be off Thursday and Friday..

Well thats all I got, hope everyone has a great day.

what a day

I did it I exercised really hard again, it was a bit easier.. Then I made taco soup for lupper. Cole was doing his laundry, Jeff got home around 1. I was about to sit down and relax after my hard workout, when all of sudden the washer made a horible noise and just stopped. That was it , it died.. It was full of water...We had no choice but to go buy a new one..I had evey intensions of buying the cheapest one and just be done with it, but Cole said he would pitch in so we upgraded and bought a nicer one.. The down side that I didn't notice while buying this newer one is its an high effeciance so you  can only use h.e. approved laundry soap. I guess I will get used to it..
Well thats all that is going on..Hope everyone has a great day.

new to me

My mom called me yesterday all excited about what she learned about speeding up your metabolizism..Apparently while waiting for there load in California they met two people at a restraunt and got to talking to them. The lady is a nutristinst and was in her mid 40s. My mom said she had a knockout figure. My mom was talking to her about the struggles she has had about losing weight.. My mom is big and almost didn't pass the physical this year because of her blood pressure. The doc told her she must lose weight. So she has been trying really hard, but its hard when your on the road for a living.. This lady told mom the secret to speeding up your metoblism is to take 3T of apple sidar vinegar everyday..So yesterday I started it.. It taste terrible and burns my throat going down, but I'm going to give it a month and see if it made a difference..I know one thing I pee a lot because I drink so much water, but I pee'd double time yesterday.. I know I have been retaining water I can feel in my feet and hands, so maybe the vinigar is flushing out the water too..

I encreased my workout yesterday and burned 1000 calories. I'm going to try to do it again today. I lost 1 pound from yesterday already. I have never lost 1 pound in a day a half pound but never a full pound..

Okay moving on to my obsession.. He starts the Breaking Dawn 2 promotion on the 23rd in Sydney can't wait to see him in a suit!!!

Laura when is this thing with Sydni?  I bet she is excited not only to be doing something like this , but to have one on one with you in the city..

Hope everyone has a great day

I'm weak

Okay so my diet is a bust.. I didn't totaly blow it , but I did eat some pie and mashed potatoes and gravy.. I did workout so maybe that will help..

Thats all I got , nothing new

Hope eveyone has a great day

What am I doing?

I am so so bored with my day to day life.. Not the being at home part, Lord knows I don't want to go to work.. Just the never doing anything part. The only time I leave this house is to the grocery store or to the bank for Cole..The sad thing is I really don't know what to do during the day.. I don't want to go anywhere because I don't want to spend the money on gas or just money in general..I'm trying so hard to keep money in our savings.. Jeff spends like crazy even though he wants me to save..
I really want to go shopping.. I want new boots and new clothes from bra and panties to shirts and jeans.. I don't know why I never go anywhere, but hey I would look good at the grocery store..LOL

Jordan and I are going to my mom's at Thanksgiving, we are going to stay for a week..I'm ready to get out of here..

Jordan told me he doesn't want to move out of Texas and now Jeff is saying he doesn't want to move out of Texas either.. So I guess Washington is out of the question now..I really was looking forward to living by the ocean.. Well Pugent Sound anyway..

I'm really in a funk I'm living like an old lady, but my mind still thinks I'm in my 20's..Maybe I need to try that St. Johns Wart

I started another diet on Monday.. No sweets that arn't low cal and no carbs.. I also uped my workout.. It doesn't matter though my body and my fat won't listen to my plea's to seperate.. I still weigh the same no matter what I do..

Hope eveyone has a great day.

Going to a wedding

Today Jeff's mom is getting biblically married to her boyfriend.. It will be at the garden of Eden in Eden..Its at 11 this morning,

Not much else going on here..

Hope eveyone is doing well.

Nothing new to blog about

Nothing going on here. Jeff got home Monday morning around 8 and was off Tues. and Wed. we had a nice time together. Went out to eat and saw a movie..

I'm going to my mom's at Thanksgiving. Jeff has to work his days off that week are Sunday and Monday so Jordan and I will leave Tuesday morning and stay the rest of the week. Cole has to work too so he will be with Jeff.. If they get off work early or in Cole's case maybe not have to work they can go to my aunt Jane's house. Cole would go , but Jeff said he probably won't. He is too tired when he gets in from work..Anyway when I first asked Jeff if he cared if I went he said he didn't. Tuesday when I told him I figured out his days off and decided to go ahead and go he was not pleased.. His big complaint is what am I going to eat..Ouch.. I told him I will get food that he can microwave and he can always stop and pick him up something on the way home..He didn't like those choices much, but didn't say anything..I'm going to try not to feel guilty about going and back out.. I want to spend time with my mom , I haven't seen her since March..

A mystery hair found its way onto my clean bath towel..It was blond and very long, like from the crook of your elbo to your hand long..I had just put both of us clean towels out, and took a shower when I dried off there was this hair attached to my arm.. I laid it down and got dressed and took into show Jeff.. All I said was I have a puzzle for you, how did this hair get on my towel. I showed him the hair and his words were I'm not cheating on you.. I looked at him and said I didn't accuse you of cheating on me..I had already figured it must have come off of Cole's bath towel in the wash. I wash all our towels together. and some how this hair didn't get washed away.. I just figured he bumped up against a blond at a party or something.. I never thought about Jeff cheating.. Strange how he jumped to that..

Hope eveyone has a great day

Thank You

Thank you Laura and Tia for your helpful comments..

Don't know what to do

We had a pretty good weekend.. Yes I know it was Monday and Tuesday to the normal folk, but when Jeff is off its our weekend no matter what day of the week it is.. He had an early day on Sunday , he got home about 9. so it was like he was off three days..We got along fine until yesterday.. He was really moppy and whiney telling me that he was so in love with me and that he felt that I wasn't in love with him.. It was really strange to see him like this. Okay I'm fixing to tell yall too much info about my sex life so if yall don't want to read it stop now..

We had sex all three days and he only attempted to get me off once..And then last night he tried to get me to give him a blow job.. I didn't do it, so of course he went to bed mad..
I got to thinking about what he said about me not being in love with him and I think I am starting to pull away from him , because I'm starting to see him in a different light..He say's that I have changed and I tell him the same thing.. Yes I have changed and I think its because I am so sexually frustrated. Him not satisfying me has been going on for a couple of years now.. At first I would just tell him to stop trying cause I wasn't going to cum and I felt bad for taking so long.. So now I regret all those years ago that I told him not to try, but I also see that if he really wanted me to cum then he wouldn't have given up on me so fast.. Now when he makes me cum he acts like its a burden , because I have taken forever.. I tried to explain to him that if he would love on me , and give me a little for play instead of just jumping into it maybe I would get turned on.. I'm not turned on and him sighing while I'm trying to relax doesn't turn me on..

Maybe we need to see some one, because I really do love him and want my marriage to work, but I have tried telling him what he is doing isn't working for me.. Thats when he tells me I am doing the same that I have always done.. And no thats not true he used to make love to me and take his time now he just fucks me.. Seriously two minutes and he's done..

I'm sorry to blog about all this personal crap, but I am at a loss. and writing it down helps..I just want more out of our sex life and he doesn't.. He told me so not by words but by his actions. I have talked to him about trying to do other things with me and he told me he doesn't have the energy.

My mom wants me to come and stay a week at Thanksgiving, I told her that it depends on Jeffs days off, but I really would like to go.. I would just feel guilty if he happens to be off around Thanksgiving.. If thats the case we can go together those two days..

Jeff wants me to get a job because he wants a Harley.. Yes I sure feel the love with those words..

Got Jordan started on school on Monday, he is doing two days work Mon-Fri.. That was Jeff's idea to try and get him done with the year faster.. I think its great as long as Jordan doesn't have a hard time. So far the first week is easy..

The stress of my marriage is causing me to have bad dreams.. I hate bad dreams..

Okay thats it.. Hope eveyone is doing well.

Something in the water...

Laura , when yall come to town make sure Matt doesn't drink anything made with San Angelo water.. Let me explain..

Jeff and I have issues

Tia and David have issues

and now Rondi and my brother are having issues

From what Rondi and I gather we are experiencing the same sex problems in our marriage.. It really sucks!!!

I've talked to my mom about my problems in the bedroom (yes we are that close) and I have tried everything she has suggested except the watching a porn part because my kid is always home..and honstley I have never been into porn, seems to fake to me, haa because it is!!  oh look at me being funny this morning!!!LoL

Okay moving on, I hope everyone has a great day.. Jeff will be home around 10 this morning he only had 5 hours left to work . Then he is off Monday and Tuesday.. I think Cole is taking us out to eat today.. It has been a month yesterday since we have eaten out!!  Saved on the pocket book , but didn't make a dam difference in my weight..

A good night

Jeff was able to fix our a/c last night.. Wednesday he got home at 4:30 amd tore into it, getting all the motor numbers .. Yesterday I called around to locate the motor.. Found one , he got home late , but still fixed the a/c.. Going two nights without a/c was miserable.. I slept so good last night I guess for making up for the loss of sleep those two hot nights.. I sleep for 9 and half hours.. I feel really good this morning..
I haven't exercised since Tuesday because of the a/c.. I know excuses, but it was f*cking hot in this house... I will exercise today then go to the store to pick up just a few things..

Hope everyone has a great weekend..

HOT!!

okay the a/c in our house has completly gone out.. No a/c until Jeff is off work . That won't be until Monday..We were stupid to not have just replaced the motor on his last days off instead of just fixing it to get by.. Now we are screwed for 6 more days... Hopefully the rain will come and cool things off..Right now its not too bad in the house.. I opened a few windows and got the fans going, but with it suppose to be in the 90s again today I know it will get hot in the house..

I went to download Jordan's school yesterday and one part wouldn't download.. telling me something needed to be done, but I don't speak computer talk so Jeff will have to do it..Looks like Jordan is still on summer break.. When I sit down and do his work schedule I'm going to only do 8 months instead of the 10 I normaly do.. This will increase his day to day work load.. If he struggles I will go back to 10, but I need to at least try it..

Thats it for me. Hope everyone is doing well..

Not too bad

Update on my bad things in 3's


A/C working right again for now, so no new motor at this time..

Jeff fixed his truck and it only cost us $160 .. so not bad

Washing machine part cost $135, we are undecided if we want to just buy a cheap new one or the part. We went to Kuntz  to look at there scratch and dent stuff. They had a new one that was beat all to shit for $279.. I do not want one beat all to shit since its in my kitchen.It's bad enough that my appliances don't match anymore.  .He said they were getting some more this Tuesday to come back then or Wednesday...I will go and check it out. If there is one that is cheap enough we might go ahead and just get a new one..

Everything else has been going really well..I ordered Jordan's school on Friday , it should be here Tuesday or Wednesday.. I'm going to increase his school load this year.. If he struggles I will back off, but I want to at least make him try.. He took his xbox apart last night and fixed the laser on it.. I'm so proud of him.. He went on the internet and found out how to fix the problem and did it..

Hope everyone has a great day.

Bad things in 3's

Well that saying has hit our home.. First my washing machine timer is going out.. Today I will call the parts store and see if they have the part.. This is the second time for it to go out.. The first time they didn't carry the orginal part so we had to get some kind of universal one.. It worked just not like the orginal..You had to leave the nob pushed in the whole time instead of the push , pull method.. Yes my washer is old.. We figured it up yesterday and its 13 or 14 years old.. It has been repaired 3 times before for things.. Jeff wants to just get a new cheap one.. I don't want to spend the money..

Next thing to go wrong , Jeff's driver side wheel bearings are going out.. So he has to work on his truck on his next days off. Which will be tomorrow and Monday.. Don't know how much thats going to cost us, but it has to be fixed he could be driving and his wheel could fall off.  Not Good..

And now last but not least our air conditioner motor is going out.. So until Jeff can replace the motor we have to leave the switch on the ON button instead of the Auto button.. This means that the fan is always running, but the compresser kicks on and off.. Say hello to an expensive electric bill..The good news about this is at least Jeff knows how to fix it and we don't have to call an A/C man..

So Jeff will have plenty to do on his days off..Thank God he is a man of many talents!!

I am so pissed off at myself.. I paid bills yesterday, and I always pay online.. Well my insurance payment for some odd reason wouldn't go through , it said to try again later.. So instead of waiting later I went ahead and mailed them a check, cause I thought I might forget to pay them if I don't do it now.. Well lesson learned next time I will wait till later.. Last night I got an email from them that my payment had been posted.. Well since the bill just went out in the mail , I knew it had to have been from when I tried to pay it online.. Sure enough my bank accout shows that the payment did go through.. So now I have paid them twice this month.. Thats bad since I just dished out for Jordan's school , we really needed that money for all the stuff that needs to be fixed.. The good news is now I don't have to worry about being late for next month.. Hopefully they will just apply my mailed payment to October payment..

As for my personel life , Jeff and I have gotten along pretty good since our talk.. He has stopped listening to politics and that has helped him to not be so angry.. At least he is trying..

Hope everyone is doing good.. I miss yall

Virus

We have some stupid virus on our computer. Jeff has ran the virus scan and it  isn't showing up, but we know we have one.. No matter what sight were on there is an advertisment playing. No visiul just sound.. We have to keep the speakers off because it is very annoying..

Nothing is going on here . Cole had to go out of town for work. This is his first time to do that.. He will be home Wednesday night..

I was thinking about buying that insanity work out, but decided against spending all that money..

Well hope everyone has a great day..

Weekend

Hope everyone has a good weekend.. Sorry we can't make it to the bday party.. Laura hope yall have a nice visit with everyone..

Love the rain

I'm loving this slow rainy morning.. The dogs not so much :)   

Nothing is going on so I haven't blogged.

Have not exercised all week. First my shoulder pain , then my monthly visitor. I really didn't eat wise yesterday either so I'm retaining water. I can feel it in my feet and fingers.. I had pizza..

I know its not cold enough , but if it stays rainy today I think I will make potatoe soup for lupper.. yes lupper that is my made up word for lunch and dinner. I usually cook around 1:30 so we eat between 2-3 and then I don't eat again, unless its a snack or cereal..

I'm trying a new way of thinking.. key word trying.. I'm 41 and I have weighed the same weight for over two years now, no matter what I have done its always within a 5 pound weight. I think my body and fat are best friends and I'm tired of worring about losing that 20 pounds I so despertly want to lose.. So now I am going to focus my exercising and eating right for health issues not weight loss..Maybe if I change the way I think , I will actually like the way I look.. I know I'm not obesse, my pants size tells me that.. I'm pleased with what size pants I wear when I see the number its just when I look in the mirror or get on that scale, then I see the fat person.. Anyway we will see..

Hope everyone is doing well..

okay

Well I had my talk with Jeff and it went well. A lot better than what I really expected. He seemed to be shocked about the mid life crises and maybe even a slight depression. He said he would try the St. Johns Wart.. On his days off we only had one bad moment, but I just tried to let it go in one ear and out the other.

I pinched a nerve or something in my right shoulder blade and was laying with a heating pad all day yesterday.. Its sore today , but at least I'm not in pain like yesterday.

I have things I have to run and do today and I just don't want to. Jeff told me not to , to just stay home so I don't hurt my shoulder again, but I know I need to get it done. The car inspection ran out 10 days ago, the dogs need there heart worm pills 10 days ago and Jeffs truck tags ran out 10 days ago.. So I really should have taken care of all this 10 days ago..

Sorry Laura we won't be at the bday party. I hope yall have a nice visit and the party goes well.

Well thats all I got.. Hope everyone has a great day..

Thanks Tia

I took Tia's advise and looked up mid life crisis and he has a lot of the symptoms.. I sure hope he doesn't fall into the cheating one though..Good news is 80 percent of married people stay married.. This weekend I'm going to pull up the web site again and talk to him about it, because I know me just telling him about it will only piss him off..I really hope it passes quickly or we may have to live in  different houses until it does... He is so mean to me sometimes and vocally abusive.. Not like Doug was ,but he says things that still hurt.. Cole gets his wrath also, and then that causes war between me and Jeff cause that shit isn't happening..So far Jordan is still in the clear..

Laura I want to come to the birthday party and I asked Jeff if he wants to come because he will be off work... He said maybe. I probably won't know for sure until that day sorry I can't give you more time.. I'm thinking about coming without him , but I don't know it depends on his mood that day..

Hope everyone is doing well.

Serious problem

My treadmill is broken.. *sad face*   Jeff said he will tear it apart on his next days off and look at it..He is actually off  Friday and Saturday..So for now its just the eleptical..
Jeff was off Thurs. and Friday this week and I swear every time he is off we spend too much money.. I haven't figured the check book yet , but I'm guessing we spent  $300 and I still haven't gone to the grocery store..We ate out the whole time he was off and he had to buy work boots.. Luckily he will get $80 back from his work  on his boots..
Cole pitched in for groceries again this week, which is very helpful..I mean how am I suppose to save money when Jeff spends it like crazy..
I'm going to the store's today.. I think I will go to HEB instead of WalMart and then run out to Sams.
Yes my life is so exciting.. We did go to the movies Thursday and saw Lawless it was pretty good. Then on Friday we went out to Vonda's and they fixed us lunch.. It was our first time to there new home in Eden and our first time to actually visit with her new boyfriend Brad..He seems nice...

I have a big issue that I need to vent about, so if your not in the mood to hear it stop reading now..

I really don't like my husband right now.. Don't get me wrong I love him, but he is just an angry , hypocritacal man.. I don't think he likes me right now either..First off he is always telling me I need to get out of the house and do stuff, but when I do go out and do stuff.. Like the Roller Derby or lunch with my brother he calls me non stop or makes rude remarks about how nice that must be for me to go eat out with my brother.. Then in traffic OMG he is terrible constantly bitching about how people drive or happen to look his way, yet he doesn't pay attention on his driving and makes mistakes as well.. Then he is so negative about all technoligy, but yet he uses it daily.. Yesterday on the way to Eden he got on his spill about how America sucks, we are so spoiled with all our luxeries.. I had told him about Rondi's new car how it has a camera in the rear view mirror and auto ignition start and how by the press of a button the back door opens up for you.. I thought all these features were fantastic , he said were all lazy and have to easy . Thats whats wrong with us to many distractions.. He then turned off the radio and said just like the radio it distracts you from paying attention while you drive.. So that was it no more radio .. Thank God we were pulling into Eden.. Then on the way home he needed to make a call and was trying to use his phone and kept swerving off the road, I mearly pointed out to Jordan that see lesson learn tychnoligy does distract you when your driving.. Jeff didn't like that comment at all and told Jordan see what a disrespectful wife looks like.. I told him he was just doing what he preached about earlier and wanted to make a point. He of course said you never back me... UGH!!!  That is just a few issues I have with him, but believe me there are lots more.. I don't know what to do, he is just not the same man.. I have tried talking to him to let him know that he is so angry for no reason.. He shouldn't let strangers affect him so much, he shouldn't let technoligy be a problem , but enjoy it he pays for it and uses it, but he just doesn't see my point..

Well thats it , I hope everyone is doing great..

just another day

Sorry I haven't blogged lately , I just really don't have anything to say. Yesterday I went to eat with Lawrence and Rondi and the kids. It was nice. Then Jordan went home with them to hang out with Hayden for a few hours. Hayden loves Jordan so much.. When Hayden was little he gave Jordan the nick name of Jo Jo cause he couldn't say Jordan.. so cute.. Now Rondi's sister little boy calls him Jordor cause he can't say Jordan..

I bought The Hunger Games dvd and Bel Ami... I wanted Bel Ami in Blue Ray but Amazon has been out.. Walmart only had two copies of Bel Ami in just normal dvd so I went ahead and grabbed one..Rob will still look good even if its not on blue ray.. I want to see his new movie Cosmopolis , but NOOOOO , our stupid town isn't showing it here...So I guess I will have to wait till dvd..

I can't believe August is all ready over.. Daisy will be one on the 29th.. She is soo funny and cute.. her nick name is little shit cause she is a trouble maker with Sasha and Penny..

Okay I have bored you enough with my dogs and movies... Hope everyone has a great day..

Hmm?

Not much is going on, Jordan and I went to eat with my Dad and family for the bday dinner. It was fun. Jordan and I shared cheese stix and fried mushrooms.. Even those sucked, but it was nice to visit with everyone.. My dad turned 60 and he still looks like he is in his 40's to me anyway. I think my dad is very handsome.
 I'm in readers heaven I have discovered another free site to read from. Apparently fanfiction was getting to picky about what could be posted and so another site has popped up where the writers can write how ever dirty they want to. I really hate all the people that make such a big deal about what people should write on there on. I mean what happen to freedom of speech. If you don't like what your reading then don't read it. The writers clearly mark 18 and up only, so if young kids read it , it really is not the writers fault.. Anyway this new site is called The Writer's Coffe Shop ( twcs) I had to register, but it's free.. No biggie .

My body is freaking out again, I really should go see a gyno.. I haven't been since 2005 when I got my tubes tied..I guess my body doesn't like me running cause I have started spotting.. A few years back I had to quit re-arranging furniture cause everytime I would I would spot.. Jeff was pleased I couldn't re-arrange me not so much.. Then we moved into this house and I can't re-arrange at all. This house has no options to small..  Back to the gyno , I really don't have a doctor and don't know where to go.. I used to go to Family Planning , but there history now. I thought maybe I could go to Planned Parenthood, but with the constant protester's outside it makes me nervous..I know just an excuse not to go..I have been out of my thyroid pills for two weeks now, and really I don't know why I haven't bought anymore. I guess I wanted to see if I could tell I wasn't on them or maybe just to lazy to go buy some more.. The only thing that I have notice is my feet tingle and I feel really swollen..

Jeff is off Wed and Thurs this week..

Well thats it for me.. Hope everyone has a great day.

Bday dinner

Tomorrow is my dad's bday , so tonight we are all going to eat at Lowake. I hate Lowake, but its not my choice so it is what it is. Also it won't be till 8 .. On the bright side I won't eat much.

I'm so discouraged, I have been running now for 3 weeks and all have to show for it is an extra 3 pounds..I know I haven't ate the smartes, but I really didn't expect to gain that much. A typical day for me with food is ;  a bagel for breakfast or a lowfat breakfast sandwich or waffels. Then between 2-3 we would eat our main meal and its usually healthish, and I don't stuff myself. Then around 5 I would eat a snack and yes this is where the sweet tooth kills me. This week it was that dam chocolate cake, last week it was cookies and cream ice cream.. Then thats all I would eat for the day. I'm really going to try to just eat the high calorie sweets once a week, its just so hard..

Well thats all I got , I hope everyone has a great weekend..

oh and something that really is shocking to me, I really like running.. Never thought I would be one of those  people but I am.. It feels really good, maybe one day I will run outside instead of on the treadmill..

At a loss

Not much happening here. Jeff got a new phone on Tues. he got an iphone I'm still pleased with my EVO so I didn't upgrade. He cooked a brisket and we had beans and potatoe salad yesterday. So yummy, he really does do an awesome brisket..
I have been exercising faithfully but have had sweets everyday. Either ice cream or now its that dam chocolate cake. I went ahead and weighed myself this morning.. Big mistake, I'm so pissed.. Well maybe that will help me to stay away from sweets everyday and just eat them one day a week..

Roller Derby

So Jordan and I went to the Roller Derby yesterday. San Angelo against Denton then San Angelo against Abilene. San Angelo lost both games they really sucked. then Abilene against Denton. That game was bad ass . those two teams are really rough and Abilene is really good. One of Abilene's team mate got hurt pretty bad and had to go to the hospital. I thing her ankle go broken. I really enjoyed it , it was my first time to see a Roller Derby and I would like to see it again. Jordan didn't care for it and he probably wouldn't want to see it again.
 I'm really pleased with myself for exercising all week. Mon, Wed, Fri. I ran two miles . Thurs, Sat. did a tonning dvd. I'm hopping this week I will not skip Tues and do the tonning dvd.
Today I plan on resting no exercise.
Hope everyone is good..

its been awhile

I know I haven't blogged much lately , but honestly nothing new is going on. Cole goes today for blood work to see what made his eyes bleed. Hopefully they can't find anything wrong. Now that the doctor said his eyes were not bleeding anymore I really believe he damaged them himself..
Got a text from Temple the other night. Aaron is in town and wanted to come by and see Cole. He has been away to college in California.
Jeff and I had a blow up of a fight Tuesday morning..Were fine , just we both have had some issues with each other..Of course what he tells me my problem is , is not what I see. But his excuse for the way he treats me is my fault because thats the way I treat him.. So I'm trying to make an extra effert to change what he said my problem was..
Jeff did not apply for that job in Washington. He said he would not apply for any job till we had the money to move on saved up and the yard sale done.. He is hopping maybe spring or early summer next year we can move.. We will see..
I am up to running two miles straight now. It takes me 25 minutes still at 0 incline. I have not weighed myself and don't plan on it until next friday.
Well thats all I got.. Hope everyone is doing well.

Good News

Yesterday was Cole's eye laser.. The doctor said that all the bleeding has now stopped and everything looks really good. He scheduled the blood work that was suppose to have been done already , but some how slipped through the cracks and didn't get done. So Cole goes in next Thursday for blood work to see if they can find out what caused the bleeding in the first place. And then he goes back in to doctor in 3 months.. I still feel like Cole damaged is eye's himself..

My uncle Pete called me to tell me about a job for Jeff in Washington, but Jeff hasn't had a chance to go online and fill out an app for it..It would be a great job, starting pay is $80,000 a year. I really want him to apply for it.. Even thought we don't have the amount of money saved that Jeff is requiring if he got a job before we moved that would be good..

I have only ran once this week then my monthly visitor came and it has been a rough week..I have ate responsibly though so at least I didn't pig out and not exercise..

YEA!!!   Jordan is done with school for this grade level.. I'm so proud of him his finial grades were really good..  Science 94, History 96, English 88, Math 92  . Now I will give him about a month off for summer.

Hope everyone has a great weekend!

just an update

Not much going on here.. I am up to 20 minutes jog time now and it feels great.. I'm only doing it 3 days a week for now, but thats a start.. I thought I might start a toning dvd on Tues and Thurs we will see. Had a good weekend.. Jeff was in a good mood so it was nice..
Today I get my haircut and Thursday Cole goes back to the doctor for second round of laser on his left eye..
Thats all thats going on..Hope everyone is good..

just sad

I ran three times this week , and watched what I ate. I even ate fruit and veggies we bought on Saturday insteed of potatoes and ice cream like everyone else.. Well I weighed this morning and I only lost half a pound.. I was so hopping for at least two pounds.. I am suppose to start tomorrow so maybe I'm bloated.. I really hope thats the problem..

So all of you know my love for Robert Pattinson, my heart really hurts for him and what that stupid bitch did to him..So I have been on twitter and my favorite Rob web site.. Poor guy, I really hope he doesn't take her back.. The guy she cheated on him with is so gross.. Normal people don't cheat on Rob we cheat with Rob... just kiddding cheating is wrong..

Jordan and I might go to the movies today, still not sure of that. I do have to run up to store and get a few things , but other than that no plans.

I'm seriously tired of my husband telling me NO... He must be going through a mid life crisis cause he just isn't happy and never wants to do anything.. He was off last weekend and I tried and tried to get him to let us go to Austin or San Antonio hell I even tried Sonora caverens, but NOOOOO was his response with a scruntched up face.. Then on Saturday night my brother called and wanted to see if we wanted to go have a drink with him and Rondi and of course the answer was NOOOOO.. Then my mother called me Wednesday and told me she finially bought me a blanket with a unicorn on it.. Yes I love unicorns always have , I have collection and my mom always contributes to them. Anyway for years now she has been searching for this blanket and she found it for me.. I'm really excited to see it.. Anyway I told Jeff I should get a tattoo of a unicorn (cause I want a new tattoo anyway) and he said FUCK NOOOO you don't need anymore tattoo's...That really had my blood boiling.. Then last night I told him Jordan and I may go to the movies today and he looks at me with this strange face and says Oh Really and that was it.. He has been making comments to me about getting a job , which he has never done before.. I don't know , but I think this Sunday on his day off we are going to have a long heart to heart because something is going on with him..He has been looking at jobs online that are not truck driving.. Maybe he just tired of driving a truck and for him to take another job will require me to work because he won't make enough money..Every time I see him online I ask him what you doing and just says nothing.. So he doesn't want to talk about a different job with me yet..The thing is we discussed this before I started homeschool Jordan . I will not work untill he is done with school.

Sorry to unload.. Hope everyone has a great weekend!

I'm sore

I'm so sore , yesterday I ran for 16 minutes. As of this morning I can barely sit and stand. My legs hurt all over. Who knew the back of your thighs could even hurt.. So no running for me today. I haven't decided if I will walk on the treadmill or just take today off and run tomorrow. I probably should have done every other day running and I probably wouldn't be hurting right now. Well thats it. hope everyone has a great day.

OMG!!!

I am so proud of myself... I did way better than I thought I would have. I guess I'm in better shape than I thought. I ran at 5.0 speed at 0 incline for 1.2 miles in 15 minutes.. I havn't ran that well since last spring at the KOA.. By the time I did my cool down I only burned 200 calories, but hey it beats what I would have burned sitting on the couch.. Now for my shower then food..

oh you know

We had a nice weekend. We got up early Saturday and went to the farmers market, it was our first time. I was very pleased we got a lot of stuff for just $20. I will be going again. Then Jeff cooked ribs on the smoker and we just chilled for the day. Sunday didn't do a dam thing but lay around.
I read a story over the weekend where this very over weight girl started running everyday to lose weight. It was a great story. I think I'm going to try her method. I'm not much of a runner, usually I can last two minutes and thats it, then the treadmill moves on to a walking fast with a high incline, but I think I'm going to try to just leave the incline at 0 amd start out with a slow run and see how long I can last. Then every day I will increase my time by 30 seconds.. Its not much of a workout , but its a start. What I'm doing now is not making a difference so maybe by bumping up to running even though it may only be two minutes for starting as long as I do it , its got to help.
Well I got nothing else, I hope everyone has a great day.

Board

Jeff should be home soon, he only had 4 hours left on his log to drive. Then he is off Saturday and Sunday. I want to go somewhere so bad. We talked last night about going to Fiesta Texas like everyone else seems to be doing this summer. We have never been. Jordan is older now so he might ride some rides now. Jordan said he wasn't sure if he would ride or not. We told him he has to try or he will never know if he likes them now. Yes I was blessed with children that didn't like to ride rides which was very helpful when the carnival came to town, but now he is 15 he might like them now.
Anyway as of now no plans.
Took Sasha and Penny to get there shots yesterday and I always forget how Sasha has an elergic reaction to them. Her poor little snout swelled up and I had to run to HEB to get benadryl for her. It was a rough night for her, but she is good this morning.
I weighed yesterday because I have not exercised or ate many veggies and fruit and I'm pleased to say I have not gained anything. I have not lost anything either, but at least I'm maintaining. I really wish my body would quit maintaining this weight. I have weighed this weight for over a year now. I tired of it. If I could lose 10 pounds and maintain I would be semi happy.
Well Jeffs home now and wants breakfast.. Hope everyone has a great weekend.

Nope, Natta, Nothing

I have done exactly nothing since Saturday... Saturday was nice , Jeff was off and we just ran errands and ate at Olive Gardens, but he was in a good mood, Jordan was his funny self and I laughed all day..He went back to work on Sunday in his on truck, no more floating YEA!!  I have been so lazy this week. I have ate semi okay , but have not exercised at all.. The good news is that desert Jeff made is not something that I like too much so I haven't been eating too much of it. Just a small piece. I don't like the peanut butter cups part of the brownie.. Don't get me wrong I love peanut butter , but it just doesn't taste well with the brownie.. My opinion everyone else loves it.. I'm glad I don't love it , cause with me not exercising I really don't need to eat a lot of sweets.
Sasha and Penny get there shots on Thursday so thats all I have planned this week..
Jordan has one more week of school and then I will let him have a month off for summer. I'm ready for the break myself..
Sometime within the next 6 weeks we are going to take a mini vacation.. We have not had a family vacation since Coles summer before his senior year.. We need to do something , but I have no idea what..I know I want to take Jordan to Austin to see the Capitol, but I don't know what else we could do in that area.. Any ideas?
Well thats about all I got to say.. Hope everyone is doing good..

A good day

Yesterday was fun.. Jordan found a pair of shoes in the first store we went to. I tried on 7 dresses and bought 2 they were super cheap so I'm pleased.. Then we went to Sams.. Not a good idea when your hungry.. I bought so much crap that is not good for my diet.. I bought good stuff too maybe I can be strong and stay out of the bad stuff... yea right!! Not much else to say.. See yall Friday!

Shopping

Today Jordan and I are going to go shoe shopping for him.. That boy is having a growth spurt and needs tennis shoes.. He has his converse , but wants regular shoes.. I want to run to Ross and see if I can get a couple of cheap sun dresses.. I know I shouldn't ,but I am.. I probably won't find anything anyway.. Then we are off to Sams.. YUK!!
Thats it, hope everyone has a great weekend..

Not much

July 4th was pretty fun because Jordan and I actually went and did something. My cousin Peter and his wife invited us out on there boat. Jeff was at work so he couldn't come. Jordan tubed and tried to get up on skis but the water was to chopping for that. Maybe another time.. We both got a little sunburned which is odd since I slathered us down with the sun block.. I should check and see if the stuff goes bad it is from last year..Anyway it felt good to get out of the house. Thats the first time in 3 years since we have been out on a boat.. Later that night we just sat in our front yard and watched the fireworks.. We could see both Nasworthy and Freedom Fest from the Colts stadium.. It was nice no traffic to deal with..Thursday Jeff was off so we just ran some errands. Today he is off and he is going to cook us some leg quarters and we got beans in the crock pot and I will make potatoe salad.. Good day to lay around and veg out.. Hope everyone has a great day.. See yall soon.

My life

So my life has been pretty dull.. Haaa!!    We are trying to get adjusted to Jeff changing jobs.. He is no longer in training as of this past Saturday.. So Friday night was crazy because they don't have a truck for him to use yet.. Its not here so Jeff is going to be a floater.. Which is a pain in his ass and dispatch cause he will use everyones truck on the normal guys day off.. He was suppose to be off today and tormorrow, but now they had him off Monday and he will work Tues and Wed. and be off Thurs and Fri and then work the next 6 days.. Hopefully the new truck will get here soon..I'm hanging on to every penny we don't have to spend because I'm not sure how much his check is going to be on the 13th.. At least it will be for two weeks .We got his insurance packet in and holy cow were we disappointed.. With Multi Chem insurance for the whole family was only $129 bi-weekly Now with GoPetro its $322 bi-weekly...Thats a big chunk out of his paycheck..But we have to have it so we will adjust. The good news is insurance starts for all of us Aug 1st. 
Tonight Jordan and I are going to meet my dad and step mom at the river stage to watch the fire works. We do it every year that we are in town..Tia if yall would like to join us text me..
Cole has started not coming home on the weekends except to shower and leave again..He hangs out with some kid he works with that has his on place..I worry like crazy , but I know I have to let him be. He is 20 its just really scary not knowing what your child is doing..
I have not exercised this week, I have that annoying visitor and I don't exercise while the visitor is here..
I'm really looking forward to  the 13th.. I wish I could get another tattoo , but thats not going to happen unless Jeff's check is really good.. I'm already going to spend money for dinner and a movie.. Which is fine I have been hanging on to everything we have..No unneccasry money has been spent..I'm actually pretty proud of myself.. It really helps that I don't fricken go anywhere.. I want to go shopping for new clothes but I won't.. Anyway back to the tattoo.. I really want my lady bug with the vine going up my foot.. I know it will hurt like hell , but I still want it, so as soon as we have the extra money I'm getting it.. Jeff is already bitching about it.. I was hoping that I would finially get to my goal weight so I could get my heart shape pad lock on my hip but that stupid 20 pounds just won't go away..
Well I hope everyone is doing good, see yall in 10 days.

Sorry its been a while

I was going to blog yesterday , but the stupid electricty went out.. Then once it came back on I wasn't in the mood to sit at the computer.. Jeff was off on Monday and Tuesday it was nice. He cooked for us and we just hung out at the house and had a few drinks.. He gets so excited with new cooking equipment. He got a dutch oven for fathers day and couldn't wait to use it.. It will be a great thing to use if we ever go camping.. He says we are, but its too hot right now. Maybe in September..We tore down the pool and hauled it off to the dump.. I'm so glad that I had decided to drain it and not use it anymore. Once we pulled the liner off the whole bottom of the pool metal was rusted threw and there was holes . I don't think it would had held up.. Then that would have been a mess.. Were going to try and make another dump run next month. He keeps so much shit that he never uses are thats broken or its a piece of this or that ...He is a pack rat..We get his first pay check tomorrow , but its training pay and only for one week.. I have to make the house payment out of it and the cable bill.. I hope its going to be enough to cover.. I have been hanging on to all of extra money, so if his check isn't enough I can dip into our savings, but I don't want too..
With my aunt and uncle back in Seattle its really been working on me to move up there.. I need a change I just want to move anywhere.. Its so pretty up there and there is soo much to do.. The rain was a pain , but you get used to it.. I'm just so tired of this place and its so hot.. I know I'm old now when I complain about the heat.. I used to love being outside..Jeff said if I can save up $5000 or more he would seriously look for a job up there.. Then we would move up there and just rent this house out. I know what he's thinking , by the time I have that much saved I will change my mind about moving.. And I might , I am a woman.. I almost have half saved now he just doesn't know it..If we did move up there my mom would freak out..
Jeff told me he thinks I don't love him anymore and that I act different towards him. I feel like such a failure to make him feel that way.. I'm just so tired of the way things are right now.. I feel like my life is on stand by.. Untill I can get Jordan finished with school and he gets his license and a job..
I've done really well with my exercising, but not eating right.. I haven't gained , but I haven't lost. I talked to my cousin last night about Weight Watchers and it reminds me of LA , but you follow a points system instead of coloring in the circles.. She does it all online. She has lost 15 pounds in three months.. She said the key to it is to eat all the veggies and fruit you want and of course limit your carbs. and dairy. You get to have one splurge day a week.. So its a basicly the program we all know we need to do its just makes keep track.. My problem is I don't eat enough.. I did great that one week with the veggies and fruit, but I get tired of veggies and fruit.. Like yesterday I had a lofat Jimmy Dean breakfast sandwhich and then four very thin , very small slices of pinapple & canadian pizza.. Thats it all day..
Well I have run out of things to say.. Hope everyone is doing great and I am excited about our girls bday night..

Blah

Sorry I got nothing.. Since Breaking Dawn part 2 trailer is out it made me miss part 1 so I did watch that this week..
I have exercised everyday except Tuesday, but I have also had ice cream everyday.. I weighed Monday morning and again just now and I still lost two pounds.. So thats good.. I'm still bouncing between the same old 5 pounds that I always do though.. I would really love to break that pattern..
The boat races are here this weekend and Cole will be going all weekend.. I worry about him with this new group of friends he hangs out with.. He works with them , but they are all young and live on there own.. I just hope he doesn't get sucked in to the bad stuff.. I had a heart to heart with him this past weekend and told him how afraid I was for him.. I just pray that he takes after me more that Doug when it comes to all the stuff that will be offered to him..He will be 20 on Monday and I know I need to let up on my mother hen syndrome, but he is still my baby and its hard...
Jeff's last pay check from Chalk Mtn. was suppose to be today , but its not in the bank , which means it probably was mailed..YUK
I want to go shopping so bad, I want new summer dresses.
Hope everyone has a great weekend.

Cole

Tuesday , Cole got his blood work results back and its not diabetes. They are 100 percent sure he does not have diabetes. So thats good news. He also had his left eye laser done on Tuesday and its still bleeding.. The doctor lasered some and then Cole will go back Aug. 2 to have it done again. In the meantime Cole has to have more blood work done to look for other causes.. The doctor is sure this is caused by a medical condition and not something Cole has done himself.. So now more testing will be done. Not sure when but sometime before Aug. 2.

Jeff started his new job on Tuesday and everything went good..Hopefully he won't have to be on training very long.

I did exercise for one hour on the treadmill on Monday, but yesterday we had so much doctor stuff and errands to run I didn't, but I am today. My goal is one hour on treadmill every other day and 30 minutes eleptical on the others.. Then once I have adjusted to that I will start my tonning dvd again..

Our weekend was no big deal.. Saturday Jeff didn't feel good so we didn't go out to dinner with the whole family like we had planned. Then Sunday we went to Norton. It was nice we stayed about 3 hours..

Hope everyone is doing well.

Jeff's new job

Well last night was the end of Chalk Mtn. for Jeff. He is off now for 3 days to help him get back to a normal sleeping pattern. He goes in Monday at 11 for the rest of the paperwork and then starts Tues. for GoPetro (Stripes). Hopefully training won't be but a day or two, cause its an hourly rate of very little money. So once again we are hanging on to everything we have.. With exception of Saturday night. Which I might be getting screwed on.. Let me back up and tell the story. My brother called Wednesday and wanted to know if I wanted to go in halves and take Dad out for fathers day dinner on Sat. night. Well with Dad comes Clara, but going in halves would only be like an extra $20 for us each. So I said yes.. Then my cousin Debbie called same day and said she is having  her bday dinner Saturday at Lowake and wants us to come. I explained to her that we had intended on taking Daddy for dinner. She said thats fine just to let her know. Well I called my brother and told him what was going on and he of course threw a fit. He doesn't like Lowake so he is not going there. Well my Daddy called and of course he wants to go to Lowake with everyone. Make it a big bday and Fathers day dinner.. So now Lawrence isn't going and were looking at footing the entire bill for Dad and Clara..Maybe he will change his mind. I don't really like Lowake either, but I will go because thats what Daddy wants to do. Jeff and I have decided we will just get a burger, thats cheap and not to hard to screw up..Then on Sunday we are going to Norton, yep you heard right its been 6 months since we have seen any of Jeff's family so we are going for MawMawB's 87th bday party.  Today I'm going to Sprint to get an SD card for my phone. Cole put his in my phone and it worked just fine, then he put mine in his and it said the same thing it does on mine. So its the SD card for sure.. I'm up for upgrade 8-1, but I really like my phone so I don't know if I will upgrade or not.
Hope everyone has a great weekend. Diet and exercise begins Monday...

SD card

I don't know what happened, maybe its time for a new phone or a new SD card for my phone.. This is the second time this has happened. I was downloading music from my amazon mp3 and all of a sudden it said couldn't download that my SD card had been removed. Well I open up the phone pull out card re-insert and try again. Then it said no space available. Which I don't see how that is possible , but anyway I download all my pictures onto the computer to get it off the card.. There was so much crap on that card.. Crap that I didn't put there. It was so strange it had my bank web site picture, my blog site picture, stories from fanfiction plus pictures of cd albums , pictures of people that I didn't even know.. There was like almost 800 items on my SD card.. So I had a lot of deleting to do off the computer.. Then when I put the SD card back into phone it said it was damaged , still no space available or unmounted.. So today I will be taking the phone in to Sprint..Which I hate going into that store its always so bussy..
Jeff goes to work today , but only for 3 days.. YEA!!!   I'm so ready for him to be on days..
We are going to Norton on Sunday, it is grandmothers Bday party.. We haven't seen any of his family since Mandy's wedding and that was in January.. Sad since Vonda (Jeffs mom) comes to town 3 times a week to keep Ryan (Mandys baby)
Well thats all I got.. Hope everyone has a great day

So sad

Well yesterday morning Jordan and I got up early and went and helped my aunt and uncle load there uhaul.. I was surprised we were the only ones to come and help. Cindy said I was the only one who even called to offer any help.. So we got them all laoded up.. Very proud of Jordan he worked really hard.. Then that evening we went to my aunt Janes house for the going away dinner.. I love Cindy and Pete so much , I am very close to Cindy. She is like one of my best friends.. I'm truley going to miss her, but I'm also happy for them to be where there other kids and grandkids are.. I just hope I will get to go up there for a visit a lot..
They were heading out early this morning..
Tomorrow Cole goes in for the rest of his blood work for all that diabetes stuff..
Jeff is off today and tomorrow then he will only work 3 days then thats it for Chalk Mtn. He starts up his new job on Monday 18th.. Thats when I will begin my exercising again.. I'm still watching what I eat, but no exercising.. I also noticed I really need some sun on my legs, but its just so hot I don't want to go outside.. Which just makes me mad cause I used to love being outside.. Does this mean I'm getting old?? 
Thats all I got. Hope everyone has a great day.

Days off

Jeff was off Monday and Tuesday. On Monday he got word from GoPetro that he can start work for them , so since he was off he went up to his job and gave two weeks notice.. He begins GoPetro on the 18th.. So I have decided that is when I am really going to give it my all and get back to exercising again.. Jeff will be gone in the mornings so I will have no excuse not to do it..
In the evening time on Monday I went to hook up the hose in the front yard to water the plant on my porch and when I stepped off the porch I sank into mud.. Water leak, YUK!   So Tuesday , while Cole and I were at his doctors Jeff and Jordan began fixing the leak.. All I can say is thank God it was an outside leak, because it was actually two different leaks and took Jeff 4 hours to fix and me running up to Home Depot twice..
Cole's doctors visit went good.. He said the bleeding was already stopping.. He still believes its caused by diabetes and wants all the blood work that Cole will have done on the 11th faxed to his office..I asked the doctor if Cole could have damaged his eye himself , but he says No cause the bleeding is on the back of the eye and the contact is on the front of his eye.. But the doctor really doesn't know the whole story behind the contact abuse, so I'm still thinking thats what caused it.. Especially since he worked on the right eye yesterday and said the bleeding had stopped already, cause it was the left eye he gave the shots in..Anyway I'm still hanging on and having faith that Cole is a healty young man..
I guess thats about it.. Hope everyone has a great day..

just the same

I got nothing going on.. Yesterday I ate all day.. I don't know if it was from the drinking the night before or just my pain in the ass visitor..
Cole has his right eye laser tomorrow at 3..
My aunt Cindy called me yesterday and told me that Stefanie (her oldest) said that if I come up she already has plans for us.. I told Cindy it wasn't happening I have too much mom duties this month with Cole, but we talked it over and we do want to go on vacation there , so as soon as we get money saved we are.. Jeff wants to drive instead of fly cause he said it would be cheaper, but that means he will need two weeks off of work.. That isn't happening.. Don't get me wrong I would love to drive I love traveling and it would be good for Jordan, but flying would be so much faster.. It probably wouldn't happen till next year anyway , cause with Jeff changing jobs he won't get vacation time till he's been there a whole year..I wish we had the money now and we could go before he changed jobs.. oh well

I had so much fun Saturday , hope everyone has a great day

something to do

I'm looking forward to this weekend.. It will be fun to hang out with everyone..

Nothing has been going on this week... Jeff was off Tues. and Wed. we just hung out around the house.. He has decided that he would like for us to start camping again.. He even bought fishing line to string his fishing poles so they will be ready.. We haven't camped in probably 10 years..I love to camp that was the one thing we did every summer as a kid was going camping.. We had a boat and everything you needed to spend the weekend at the lake.. When Jeff and I got married we only camped a few times he was not a fan of camping.. So I'm a little surprised by the fact that our sons are almost grown and now he wants to camp, but hey I will take it...

Still haven't exercised , but have eaten really healthy.. It helps to have veggies and fruit in the house.. I have been weighing every morning again to keep on track..

Hope everyone has a great day.. See yall Saturday

Better today

I'm in a much better mood today..You know how it is sometimes you just need to vent..I think it was more about him telling me NO then anything.. I wouldn't have went once I came down off my high of thinking about going.. Cole has all his medical stuff coming up this month and I want to be with him..
I didn't exercise like I said I was yesterday I'm going to try today.. I have been eating more but its fruit and veggies.. since last friday I have lost 2 pounds so thats only been 4 days so I'm pleased with that.. I know I need to exercise I know it would help my funk that I'm in. I need to get with it.. I really hope Jeff gets to start at GoPetro soon.. I know I would exercise again if he was at work during the day.. Its the whole not being able to shower after I exercise that makes me not want to do it.. Well not the whole reason , but a big one..I hate sitting in sweaty clothes for hours. and I refuse to shower in the boys bathroom..I would have to move all my stuff, plus gather up clothes to wear after my shower , plus the ones I work out in.. Just a pain .. yes I know its an excuse.. see I'm in a funk..

My baby brother turns 30 on Friday, We were going to go to his house and bbq , but since Jeff is now working a different job we can't go.. bummer.

Okay getting off now. Hope everyone has a great day.

My favorite Aunt & Uncle

Yesterday we went to my cousins house warming BBQ and there I was told that my aunt and uncle ( Cindy & Pete) were moving back to Washington.. They just confirmed the move on Friday. They have been back and forth from Washington to Texas for over 25 years.. If you recall I had there daughter Lacey living with us her freshman year until they got back down here to Texas.. So they have only been back here for 3 years this time.. Lacey will be a senior this year and at first when they were talking about going back to Washington , Lacey was going to stay here and finish school.. Now she has decided to move with them..I am happy for them to move, they loved up in Washington and they have two more daughters and 5 small grandkids that live there so they miss them very much.. We also have more family up there.  so its home to them there as much as it is here in Texas. I am happy for them because I know how much they love it in Washington and want to be with there other children and grandchildren, but I'm also very sad to see them leave..I am very very close to Cindy, she is one of my best friends. I don't talk on the phone much as you all know , but my mom, Jeff, and Cindy and my other cousin Peter are the only ones that call me all the time.. My mom calls me every single day, Jeff calls me from work sometimes and Peter calls me about twice a week , Cindy calls me at least once a week and we used to do lunch about twice a month.. She is also the one that always invites us to all the family get togethers. My dad always forgets and my aunt Jane calls sometimes, but mostly it was always Cindy to let me know and invite us..
She asked me yesterday if I would like to ride up with them to Washington and stay a bit and then fly back home.. Of course it would  be Jordan and I.. which I would absolutely love.. Jordan doesn't remember us living there he was only two.. Jordan was all for it as well.. You should have seen his face light up.. When I talked to Jeff about last night on the phone he told me NO!!!   He said we would just have to save our money and go on vacation to see them.. I understand that he was jealous because he has to work and couldn't go with us, but it hurt my feelings that he just said NO and not even try to discuss the possibility. I know I'm pmsing so it probably isn't that big a deal, but it just went all through me that he has this much power over me.. I'm really starting to second guess our marriage.. He gets mad at me because I don't leave the house and do anything, but when I asked to go to Washington he out right says NO..He didn't mind me going to Vegas why Wahington?  Maybe thats it I have already done something fun this year without him and he is too jealous of the fact that I want to do something else.. I think I need to start looking for a job. I know I said I was going to wait until Jordan turned 16 and was able to work and we are working towards his GED so he would be done with school, but  I don't like being told NO the way he told me.. It was like  I was his child not his wife.. Again I'm probly pmsing . I'm just hurt..Jordan and I sit in this house day in and day out never going anywhere, it would have been nice to go.. Again I do understand Jeff makes the money and he works hard for it so I know he was jealous of us going and not him. He just should have said that and not got manly and say NO.
Okay sorry for my rant.. Hope everyone has a great day..

The weekend

So last night Jordan and I went and saw Men in Black 3.. It was so good.. I laughed so much , it felt so good to laugh that hard.. It was just as good as all the others.. Next Friday we are going to go see Snow White and the Huntsman.. I can't wait.. There is so many movies out or about to come out that I can't wait to see.. A couple are already on DVD .. I want to see the Vow and the one with Daniel Ratcliff where he is in some haunted house. I can't think of the name of it.. I don't usually watch scary movies , but that one caught my eye and I want to watch it. Problem is I won't watch it by myself.
After the movies we went to Wal Mart it wasn't to crazy in there for a Friday night. Must be a lot of Graduations going on. Today I will go to Sam's and get meat. Tomorrow we are going to my cousins house for a house warming BBQ. This is her first home so that will be nice to go and visit the family. Jeff has to work so it will just be me and the boys.
I bought veggies and fruit and I intend to use them.. Monday I will begin my workout's again.. I just get so bored of doing the same thing. Jeff agreed that once he changes jobs again and things get back to normal if we want we can join the YMCA.. I'm 50/50 on this.. I still haven't downloaded that app yet. I don't know why I haven't exactley.. Maybe I will soon... But when I do I will let you all know. Maybe its the accountability you all talk about and I'm just scared of failier. Today I plan on making me a 2 egg omlet with mushrooms,onion, and spiniach.. Yum!!   Then I will eat a cup of strawberries for snack. For lupper(lunch/dinner)  I plan on making me a chef salad with fat free dressing. Then for snack a pear .. We will see how that goes..That will be more food then I normally eat during the day, but its all good for you so hopefully it will kick start my metobilism..
Hope everyone has a great weekend!

Good News

Cole good news on Monday and Tuesday.. Monday the doctor told him his eye's were looking good and scheduled Right eye laser on June the 5th. Sorry Laura I told you the 4th..He also told Cole not to wear contacts after everything is done unless its just for a short period of time , no more sleeping in them.. Cole did not like that he hates wearing glasses.. That fact really cracks me up since it took me till his sophmore year to convince him to wear contacts. On Tuesday his blood work came back and his sugar level was normal, so they want to run two more blood test on him. One is a prediabetes test and the other is a hemoglobin test.. On June the 11th.. I still need to google hemoglobin cause I have no idea what that is..I asked Cole why they just didn't do it yesterday and he said they had to send off for the test stuff.. So yep I'm clueless why that is..Anyway his first lab work showed that he does not have diabetes.. So I'm pleased with that.. So if he doesn't have diabetes then what caused his eyes to do what they are doing , I have a theory on that let me explain.. When Cole first started at Thorps he never wore safety glasses. He would come home at night and his eyes would be blood shot from all the dirt and wind, but he would not take out his contacts.. We would hound him and hound him about taking out his contacts.. Sometimes he would go a whole month without taking them out.. He used to have problems putting them in that is why he didn't like taking them out..  months after he started working is when he started seeing things in his eyes.. We told him we thought it was the dirt that scratched eyes, that he needed to wear safety glasses and for God sakes take out his contacts and go see an eye doctor.. Well being the procrasternator that he is he didn't listen to us.. Well after what the doctor told him on Monday how contacts are really bad for your eyes because they don't let your eyes breathe and the fact that now his eyes were growing new blood vessels because the others were bleeding I think Cole damaged his own eyes by not being responsible with his contacts.. And as for the other two symptoms that Cole has that can be explained too.. He said he is always hungry and that he pee's alot.. Well for one he is a 19 year old boy working outside hard labor of course he is hungry.. For the peeing a lot well working outside makes you thirsty so you drink more.. Hell I sit at home and I pee every hour or so just from the water I drink.. Its just with his blood work coming back normal I'm believing that Cole is a healthy 19 yro boy.. His eyes are on there way to getting fixed and he has learned his lesson about his contacts. So in the future this won't happen again..Thank you God !!

Now moving on. I'm in a funk I haven't exercised at all this week and boy can I tell.. I really hate Jeff's hours. I can't wait till he goes to GoPetro so he will be up and out during the day..
He really hurt my feelings yesterday and I want to blog about it so bad but I'm really embarrased so I will just keep it all bottled up inside for now and explode later...Haa

Is that app really helping you guys stay on track?  I am so frustrated with my weight I'm thinking about checking into Weight Watchers.. My cousin's wife is doing the program and she is losing. I want to talk to her first and see if maybe she can just give me all the pointers without me actually joining , but I don't know how that works.. I also need to go buy salad stuff I haven't had a good salad in forever..

Hope everyone has a great day..

I sometimes forget

Its funny how I get so comfortable with the stuff I post on the internet that I forget strangers can access my sites. Like for instance the random comment I get from someone that I don't know, or like this morning on instagram someone liked a picture that I have no clue who she is.. I thought instagram was private amongst who was follow you, but then again I put a lot of my instagram photos on twitter, but it still makes me go hmm when someone I don't follow or is following me comments on those twitter things as well.. Its no big deal, I actually like it . Knowing that random strangers take the time to like or comment on something I have posted makes me feel less invisiable..

Well I did something that I'm not happy about, I weighed myself and I'm just sick.. I haven't weighed in a while so I was really hoping that the scale would be kind.. Nope I still weigh the same.. I only ate carbs once this week and drank 3 beers once this week and it still didn't make a differnce.. I will be checking out that app that Laura and Tia are using.. What is it again?  What really makes me mad is how my body can weigh within a 5 pound see/saw for over a year.. I am so ready to break past this.. I just don't know how.. I thought I could do it on my own , but obviously from weighing the same for over a year I'm not doing something right..I need yall's help, please give me some pointers on what to do..

Cole's eye has finialy cleared up enough he can see out of it.. So the shots and the eye drops seem to be stopping the bleeding.. I really hope he doesn't have diabetes, but the doctor didn't tell him what else could have caused this problem. He is so confident that Cole has diabetes.. Cole thinks so too, by some of the other symptoms he has.. If he does have it , I sure hope they give us a list of foods he is to stay away from, cause I have no clue.. All anyone tells me is no pasta or sugar or bread, but I'm gonna need more info than that.. I told Cole I will get a cook book and we will make it as easy for him as possible.. He is like his momma he loves sweats.. He was telling me what he ate during the day at work and I was blown away.. As much junk and candy and sweats he eats he should weigh a ton..I had no clue the amount of shit he was eating..

Hope everyone has a great day..Thanks for all your support with Cole. Love you guys!!

Got nothing to say today.. Hope eveyone has a great weekend.

Cole

Well we have some things going on with Cole that really surprised us..Please pray for him.. He went in yesterday to have his vision checked because he keeps seeing green squiggly things in his eye. He just thought they were eye flutters. Well the eye doctor said nope there not and imediately sent him to a Retna specialist.. They ran all kinds of test on him and found out that his vessels in his eyes are bleeding. So they gave him two shots in his left eye because he can hardly see out of it. And gave him these drops he has to use 4x a day for 4 days. Then he will go in today to get tested for diabetes because they said thats what causes the eyes to bleed. Plus un-benost to me he has other symptoms of diabetes. Then on Monday he goes back to the specialist to make sure he didn't get an eye infection from the shots in his eye. then they will schedule laser eye surgery on right eye. then when thats healed they will do the left eye. Not what we were expecting.. and since my son is a procrasternator he let it go for so long that he could have had his retna detached from his eye.. Also bad news is the little shit never filled out his insurance papers at work because he was still on ours.. Well now that Jeff isn't with Multi-Chem we have no insurance.. Yesterday's fees were already at $975.. They are telling him to go to the Medicade office today and apply, but I don't see him getting help from them since he still leaves at home. At first Dr. Angle told Cole to go to Shannon ER today at 5 cause he will be on call there, and he will do the diabetes test and that way he can set up payment plan at Shannon, but also that $975 was to enclude the diabetes test. Now this morning the lady called and suggested he go into La Esperanza , but when he called they can't get him in till the first of June.. So I guess he will go to Medicade and then go to Shannon at 5..

I had carbs yesterday we went and ate Mexican food for Jeffs bday.. I will do better today

What is wrong with me

Okay I'm really confused, before I started this diet of no carbs. I would have a meal between 1-3 then somewhere between 6-7 I would have a bowl of cereal or just a glass of chocolate milk and a fiber brownie.. And that would be it for the day and I was good.. Now that my head has told my stomach no carbs it thinks its starving and wanting to eat every two hours.. It is even growling at me..I'm going to still give it time. I do need to buy raw veggies though , that way when my stomach growls at me I can feed it something quick..
I keep having this wonderful dreams where I am a hot slim sexy woman and my husband can't keep his hands off me.. Then I wake up :(

Hope everyone has a good day.